Kick Your Heels Up

It’s often said that in order to enrich ones outlook on life, you should try to walk in someone else’s shoes.

These are very wise words and to fully utilize their philosophy I have decided that an afternoon of serious shoe shopping is in order.

After all, we learnt about the man who built his house on the sand.  If you start with good foundations the rest will surely follow.  Starting from the bottom and working your way up is a measured and fail proof method.  Therefore a jolly good pair of well made, soft leather, fully reinforced Manolo Blahniks is a valuable investment.  An entirely necessary investment, in fact.

Consider also the houses built on silts.  These feats of engineering enable adventurous architects to place sturdy family abodes quite literally among the salty shores.  London may be lacking in salty shores, but we most certainly aren’t lacking in wet weather and anyone who has tried to pound the pavement in a downpour would appreciate the usefulness a few extra inches could provide in order to protect ones designer trouser hems.

All in all, I feel it is my duty to visit a sparkling department store, dig deep into my pocket and improve my mental and social wellbeing with a lovely pair of Jimmy Choos.

Sexy Education

It’s time that education got sexy.  Fear not, because sexy is my specialist subject, in fact I have a Degree in sexy, a Masters in sexy… even a Brownies badge in sexy.  You didn’t know that the Brownies had a sexy badge?  I guess you must have missed that day, but I didn’t, I really earned my sexy badge.  Or at least that’s what the club leader said …

I’m starting a revolution.  I want sexuality, sex and sexiness to be embraced again, revered and applauded.  After all, we wouldn’t be here at all if it weren’t for good old-fashioned rumpy pumpy, would we?  Why are people so afraid to show their sensual side and share their inner vamp?

Gender, equality, success, love, money, health… all hot topics, and all inexplicably linked to sex.

It’s time we got back to our animal roots.

After all, birds do it, bees do it, even monkeys in the trees do it.  Let’s do it, let’s fall in love.